The wise CareGivingOldGuy knows his limits. He might have a lot of know-how, can learn some new skills, but will remain an amateur. And is it sexist to say that using a new electric tool is more thrilling than using a new hair brush?
There are some professionals with deft skills in personal attention that any person might routinely expect and want: doctoring, dental hygiene and hairdressing are three examples.
Hair care…let’s take the last one first. Women may think that hair care is elementary, but some old guys get confused by shampoo and conditioner, and when to use what. And when combing tangles became a bother, a female relative had to clue the OldGuy about when to use a hair brush.
Mobility issues had made hair care visits harder; some staff weren’t helpful, understanding or couldn’t be bothered, so we stopped going. OldGuy happened upon a friendly hairdressing owner-operator, and found out she made rare home visits! This has turned out to be a wonderful and personalized service. [picture above, outdoor haircut on a nice day]
OldGuy Nail Salon…the hairdresser had a questioning glance at the uxorial nails, then she and OldGuy looked at each other and laughed. One former home caregiver would do very nice nail care, even using nail polish, but most others didn’t, leaving it all to OldGuy.
The OldGuy just does clipping, no enamels. Hint: store brand clippers, if sheathed for a better grip, can work as well as expensive ones online. Cheap emery board nail files can be surprisingly helpful for rough spots when clipping is hard to do (toenails).
Dental care…the spouse’s self-dental care was always much better than Old Guy’s. One can just count the number of fillings, crowns, root canals and implants in his mouth. But it’s been awhile since she could do any self-care.
Her regular hygienist/dentist visits had to stop, not for mobility, but because she needed more nitrous sedation than the clinic felt they could safely use.
Home toothbrushing became more difficult, even with those disposable sponge brushes from hospitals, or the mini-brushes that have some built-in toothpaste.
Her previous dentist didn’t have a recommendation for home dental care. A few units in our area are “mobile” in the sense of going to nursing homes or other institutions, but not to private homes.
After a few years, we learned from a retired friend about a pair of dental hygienists who make home visits all over, but are based in an adjacent county. They don’t appear prominently on internet searches for some reason.
The hygienist pictured above was gentle, experienced, thorough and understanding, with impressive gear…her own portable rinse /suction machine (!), tools and motorized handpiece for cleaning.
OldGuy helped by holding the spouse’s head steady and keeping the bite block in place. There were no breathing, airway or choking issues, and no sedation was used. We used a regular living room chair and bent our knees.
Immunizations… during the pandemic, but before COVID vaccines, the HMO had a limited number of “drive-through” sites for flu shots. We (with a caregiver) trundled off, but there was vomiting from car sickness five times, twice on the way, three times on the way back. So we weren’t going to do that again.
Once the COVID vaccines were available, mobile vaccine units went to fire stations and nursing homes, but it took over six months for vendors to secure contracts to come to private homes. She did get her primary series and two boosters with home visits, but all were delayed several months.
Doctoring….with the pandemic, video visits became more available. Medicare / payers may even require periodic visits, we learned. The doctor’s office already had a copy of the Power of Atty paperwork, so not only did OldGuy attend, but we gave permission to a companion caregiver to ask questions.
CC pexels.com, tima miroshnichenko 8376291
Personal shoe shopper… yes a wise CareGivingOldGuy knows his limits. Although a local upscale store is famous for its personal shoppers, that never seemed like a want or a need here, so we haven’t had to search for one.
OldGuy wouldn’t presume to understand the professional jargon of women’s clothes, but will say that things like seasonal PJs make splendid gifts! So we won’t be rivals for those with walk-in shoe closets….
CC-BY-2.0-Wikimedia
[Since this is a non-sponsored blog, we do not endorse or mention any specific products, vendors or professionals. However these folks can be hard to find, so for those in the Seattle area, especially south of downtown, the blog has an infrequently checked email, adgadfly@gmail.com (for Alzheimer Gadfly, OldGuy’s other blog).] Personal photos considered copyrighted.
Karen Davy
Thank you for a rare, personal view of some of the many details you and countless others deal with.
I have still only had to touch the boundaries of such care with my father, who suffered for years from Parkinson’s Disease. Although not there on a daily basis, my respect for what his daily care givers did for him will remain forever.
ronlouie
Thanks! Helps that we’re not a fussy or fashionable pair, but so glad OldGuy never had to deal with the puzzling items in an old makeup bag!