Women’s clothes: cognitive test for old guys?

Women’s brassieres, an earlier post, exposed me as naive to that secret code world of female clothing.  My wife always had an attractive, professional and practical look, but little did I know how complicated a woman’s wardrobe can be.  We each did our own shopping, and I would NEVER presume to buy her clothing as a present (well, I did that once, with something that now lives in the lowest drawer).  So when the time came for me to be involved in her dressing, I was frankly baffled.

Old guy caregivers want to be self-reliant, so we might have some blind spots.  Sometimes we don’t even know what we don’t know, y’know?  I couldn’t figure out sizes, I was not good at color matching, but at least I was an ace with style (“last century mashup” is a style, right?).

All my pants have waist and length numbers (inches), which I’ve never found on her slacks, and how are dresses figured?  Shoes have a Euro and American system?  Just how do women figure out what to wear? On top of that, we were dealing with some weight issues, both up and down.

Thank goodness my wife and a wonderful female friend had set up an armoire (photo above), years before caregiving needs.  They did some genius things:  put things in translucent bins, kept socks and undies separate, sorted tops of the same fabric weight in separate bins (for different weather), kept slacks and shorts in the drawer below. The organization was nicely intuitive; most of her professional clothes were on hangars in the closet.

That same friend helps buy clothes when necessary, but even now she comes back with two or three sizes and other variations to try at home, “because even the same brand will change year to year.”

Dress Clothes Girl Female Clothing Style Fashion image CC0 Maxpixel.net

So here’s how sorting and buying clothes for a woman can be a cognitive test for an old guy: Yeah, you could count the mistakes, but the best score is when the old guy figures out it’s all futile, and registers the shortest time to cry out for help!